Thirteen
Thirteen. The age where innocence becomes deviance and immaturity takes on a whole new level.
The Pros It has a charm that can't be denied. You captured the idea of a seemingly unimportant universe inside of this one school. To any of us, it's stupid. To the characters however, it's everything. You made us root for the main character even though he would be labled a prick by normal moral terms. That is also a hard thing for a writer to do.
The Cons The main issue I had was that the narration was very inconsisstent. At times, you used your well rounded vocabulary and talent of sentence structure which made it seem like a 30 year old man was telling of his younger years. But other times you spoke immaturely which made me think the kid was telling me about what just happened at school last week. You are talented, no doubt. Just make sure you remember that not all characters can have talent, because then it steals life from them.
Final Thoughts Step one: Read 'Pros'
5 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
The Pros The strongest point of this article is how entertaining and easy it is to read. Awesome character and story development. I read through very fast and I had great mental images. You described things very well. It was funny and nostalgic, albeit a little over-the-top.
The Cons It had a few spelling and grammar errors here and there. At times I think the dialog could have been written better than it was. I found the ending to be a little predictable too.
Final Thoughts This story got it right were it mattered most. There is some room for improvement, but I think you did a good job. Those two week girlfriends, gotta love 'em!
4 out of 4 people found this review helpful.
The Pros Middle school stereotypes, I assume, are something that most of our members can relate to... that is, unless we have an abundance of 12-year-olds roaming Papertank. In any case, those of us who have been through those early teenage years should find this article at least somewhat amusing. Even though it was all a bit over-exaggerated, it was still well-written, and the ending was perfect. I especially enjoyed the parts where the setting became a music video. (If only real life had a soundtrack.)
The Cons I think I caught one or two grammatical errors somewhere in there. And I didn't particularly enjoy the dialogue, but hey, it's a story about 14-year-olds, so whatever.
Final Thoughts Being the selfish jerk that I am, I really hate to boost this article's score up above that of my own highest scoring article, by giving it a +8. But I just did. It was good, though. Not the best thing I've ever read, but still well written and entertaining... can't ask for a whole lot more.
5 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
The Pros That was simply amazing. There was good story and character developement throughout the entire thing. I really enjoyed the way it made me think back to my being 13, ahh the memories. But I digress. The story was very humerous, and surprisingly accurate. It accurately reflected the life of a 8th grader from where I went to school.
The Cons Not really many to speak of. The first line of the story was also the subtitle of the story, which I don't think is right. Also there were what seemed to be a few spacing errors in my opinion throughout the dialogue, but those may have been intentful.
Final Thoughts Good, nastalgic story. Keep up the good stuff IamAdam!
5 out of 5 people found this review helpful.
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Literature
Humor, Creative
Romance, People
Overall Stats
849 Views
22 Votes
Favorited by 3 Users Site Rankings
#3 for Score
#3 for Popularity
#3 for Favorites
Honors Recieved Featured Article (5/22/08)
Weekly Top Scoring (6/1/08)
