By all means, please! Comment as you read, even! I poured my soul into this framework. I want honest opinions, but remember, it's only a framework. Not much for sustenance YET.
You should really really REALLY consider resubmitting this in sections so readers can digest this better in chunks then get scared away by an article two miles long. Remember, this is a place to submit short stories, not entire books. I know you really care about your story so seriously resubmit this in pieces please.
This site is mainly for articles, not books or half books. Many people get tired of reading really long text, and most won't even finish it. Like Justin said, submit it in parts and more people will take time to read it all the way through.
Sitting on the beach again. Throwing stones into the blue.
I always come back here. Every time.
Shake myself off and start again.
It started on the morning of the fight.
I was tetchy, obviously – knowing your head is going to hit the canvas is not nice.
But three grand is three grand.
Five hundred people cheering as your knees buckle.
But...
