Simple Love Story

Ok, when I first started reading I though this was going to be some kind of half baked story. Oh it was far from half baked. When I got to "And if you called Herald, Samantha, well that just wouldn’t make a lot of sense. " I just about spit out my coffee. The comedy and especially the "My mom was bent over" was priceless. I couldn't stop laughing during the whole thing. Kudos to you!!!!

That was very spiffy, it seems like it should by syndicated, T.V. voice-over and the like. My favorite "passage" or whatnot was Sam getting a boner, and as 14-year-oldish as it is to say... I lol'ed

This has the same sort of humour (that I like) as in your other pieces, but perhaps a bit too many "well, you know" sort of moments of writing in the beginning that take away from the humour of the situations and makes the piece seem too much like a student writing.

Understandably it's about MySpace so perhaps that was intentional, but the informality cuts into the writing itself and, I think, breaks it up unnecessarily.

That's true, I'm going to be applying that mind-set to my next piece. Thanks for the advice.

That was interesting.

Guys need like a neutral vote because I don't want to give it a negative score just because I didn't like the story, while at the same time seeing that its a well put together little piece. I blame terrorists.

While reading it I was half expecting some random 12-15 year old to yell penis. Remember that game?

this was ridiculous! i was trying so hard not to laugh! :]

@ Flragnararch: A neutral vote would be the same as not voting at all, wouldn't it? Perhaps a weaker vote, or a neutral review, would be useful in those situations. If that's what you mean, then I'm all for it.

As for the article itself, I was somewhat speechless when I first commented more than a month ago. Looking at the article again, I have to say, it's really hilarious. I'll probably be posting a review sometime soon, since this story doesn't have any, and it deserves one.

you're pretty witty
i can dig it

"He liked the girl, found her funny, and enjoyed her huge boobs, hoping someday to give them a nice squeeze. Sam felt the same; she liked her own fun bags and squeezed them often." That line was totally witty and funny. I almost slipped off my bed when I read that. The only cons I could possibly say about this piece was that I felt it was a lil short (only because I wish I could laugh more). And the part about your mom was a lil weird . . . Aside from that, I was giggling throughout the whole read. Good job man.