Keeping your hopes high

You made a serious attempt to evaluate the human psyche. You used your own life as an example, and spoke directly to the reader. This worked somewhat well. This is a very broad and hard to cover topic so I understand the difficulty of it all. Valiant effort.

This essay was bogged down way too much with grammatical errors. You had so many unnecessary commas. At times I thought there was never going to be a period to end it. You have to got to work on your run-on sentences! It was organized poorly making it hard to read at times. There were certain points where you rambled on so much I got lost in what you were trying to say. There were also a few spelling mistakes here and there.

I like your subject and what you were trying to express. I could tell through your writing that this subject was very important to you. It just suffered so greatly from bad mechanics. I'd like for you to focus on improving them for the future. It will improve your writing ten-fold!

This basically describes how everyone's high school graduation will be. Losing the person that was always there for you, because you are going to completely different colleges, and its not the person that you are missing, its the idea of the person that you are losing. Very good topic though, and hard to write well.

There were quite a few grammatical errors of note. For an anal person like me, that distracted me from the essay. Otherwise, I couldn't really think of anything else that was too horrible to mention.

Well written article, with just a few errors throughout the entire thing. Definitely a hard subject to write on, but it was done exceptionally well.