I want to be your girl

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• 4 Reviews
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Sit there dreaming of the times when you hand touched mine.
Hoping to catch your eye trying not to cry.
Remebering the times you and I,
Shared those laughs and all the while .....
You were gone...
You were gone..

Hanging on to those sweet thoughts,
Pretending I dont even care.
Trying to love another but alls I can do is look at you,
Pretending not to care,
but all the while I am checkin your myspace
and reading all the good times you and her have.
Shared those kisses and all the while...
You were gone ..
you were gone..

Looking at the pictures of you and her,
wishing I was the one you were holding.
EVERY GLANCE,
EVERY LOOK,
I just cant stand it.....
Why cant you be
WHy cant you be .....MINE!

One last look,
One last kiss.
One last hope,
One last wish.
But before I realized what happend....
YOU WERE GONE.......

• Emotional at times

  by SimeyCook

  Posted Oct 11, 2008
  +4
  This was pretty true to life and contained a fair amount of emotion. Your observations are pretty keen at times.
  
  I didn't like th last stanza...seemed to be too much repetition for one verse. I also found that despite the emotion, the poem seemed a little flat.
  
  This is ... (read more)

• Date Added
• Oct 9, 2008 at 4:25 PM
• Article Type
• Literature
• Genres
• Poetry
• Topics
• Miscellaneous
• Overall Statistics
• 88 Views
• 4 Votes
• Site Rankings
• #298 for Score
• #207 for Popularity